108. Nerves Strike! What do I do?

Even with the best preparation, nerves can strike when you least expect it - especially right before showtime! In this episode I take you through the exact three things you need to do when this happens.

Transcript

Hello. Hello. Welcome back to That Voice Podcast or welcome if you're here for the first time. Oh gosh. At the time of recording this, there is a lot happening. Wars, my city of Brisbane is mopping up after a major flood, COVID-- I think that's still a thing. And if you are feeling all of this weighing on you and you can feel in your body, that's understandable. And I can't believe I'm saying this as a former journalist, but I can totally understand why people switch off the news. And I've found even for myself, that sometimes you just need to switch off in order to feel safe and feel okay inside your body. Uh, that let's just take a deep breath to start off today. So a deep breath in through the nose... and long breath out through the mouth while you're putting your phone on silent. It did feel far too good, let's do it again. Long breath in... and a long breath out.

Oh. It's amazing. The power of a nice deep breath. And we'll speak more about breathing in today's episode, which is called "Nerves strike, what do I do?" Of course, like most things when it comes to public speaking prevention is better than cure. And so much of my podcast episodes are about preventative measures or what to do in the lead up. The one that comes to mind is "What's your speaking runway?", which is Episode 71. And that's like what you're doing in the actual lead up to the speech or your presentation or whatever it is. But what happens if you've done all that groundwork, you've prepared your speech, you know what you're talking about. You've got to the venue early, you've done a dress rehearsal. You've listened to your pump up music. You've done your stretches. You've done your voice warm up. You've done all the things. And in that moment, before you step out onto stage or hit live on your video, the nerves strike. And you don't know what to do

That feeling takes over your body. So in today's episode, I'll take you through exactly what to do in that scenario. But first it's worth mentioning that there's a lot lower chance that these nerves will strike. If you've skilled yourself up in a big way. And that's why I'd really encourage you to join my Members Only Masterclass Vault, oh, just hit the microphone with my over the top gesticulating. I love that word. Gesturing. And in the Members Only Masterclass Vault. This is where you'll find my gold mine of incredible master classes on all different specific topics. So things like body language, how to connect on camera, how to articulate, how to memorize information, how to speak to the media.

How to speak with less arms and more intention. That's a very popular one. So I encourage you to join that. I have got the link in my show notes. And by being part of a community and working on your speaking skills on an ongoing basis, that is what's gonna build up that speaking muscle. And that's what's going to really come to the fore. When these nerves strike, it will probably prevent that even happening. It's like sport. You know, when you get to the moment when you--not that I'm a athlete or anything like that, as you know, but it's like when you get to that point where the nerves strike before the race and all your training comes back and it's there for you. So that's what the Members Only Masterclass Vault is. This is your training ground. Okay? So even with the training ground, sometimes nerves can still strike. And the first thing I want you to ask yourself is what is happening in your body?

Don't just say, 'Oh, I'm nervous.' Remembering nerves and excitement feel exactly the same way in the body. It's just our mind that's assigning the meaning. But before we get to that, just feel, what is actually going on? Is it a beating heart? Like it's gonna pop out of your chest. Do you feel like you've got a Boa Constrictor wrapping around your neck? Do you have those crazy butterflies in your tummy? Do you feel like you need to go to the toilet? Do you feel nauseous? Like you wanna be sick in a nearby pot plant? Do you feel really sweaty? Are your palms sweating like crazy? Are you shaking? Are your hands shaking? Are your knees shaking? Do you feel yourself going red? This is what I get. I feel like there's this rising river of red. And I feel like my face goes two-toned as it rises up. Do you feel really hot? Do you feel really cold? Actually identify what is going on in the body.

And then here's what you wanna do. You want to answer the body with the body. Answer the body with the body. What do I mean by that? Well, so often we have these physical symptoms and we answer it with the mind. Remember I mentioned earlier that nerves and excitement feel the same way in the body, it's the mind that assigns its meaning? Well, this is what I mean. We get the pounding heart, for example, and our mind goes, 'Oh no, you're not as prepared as you think Sal. No, you're really gonna stuff this up. There's oh, there's a lot of people out there. Your voice is gonna shake. Oh God, just get outta there.' We've got butterflies in the tummy. And our mind goes to the same sorts of things. And so, we end up spiraling down. If you answer the body with the body, we tend to embrace the nerves more. So say you've got the pounding in the heart.

If we answer it with the body, all we need to do is do a nice big heart opening stretch, stretch your arms. As far behind you, as you can take a long, deep breath into the chest area. I'm always talking about breathing into the diaphragm, breathing into the belly. But in this case, you know, a nice breath into the heart space can feel beautiful. Hold it, hold it, keep the stretch... And then breathe out and bring the arms back in. Then breathe out. Kind of like you're a human butterfly. If it is the butterflies in the tummy, start twisting. Start twist. Like you're doing "Let's twist again. Like we did last summer." That's the only amount of singing I'm gonna be doing on this episode. Right? So twist, twist, twist, and you can even prod with your hand, like prod your tummy area. If you are shaking, then let's stretch it out. So your hands are shaking. Let's interlace your fingers and stretch them away from your body. As hard as you can. If you're feeling really jittery, then start doing pushups against the wall, or just squeezing your fists together. If your hands are really sweaty, then do you have a, a little rag in your handbag or your bag?

I mentioned I get really red. So one thing that I'll do is I'll keep a little ice pack in my bag, wrapped up in a tea towel and in a plastic bag. So I don't make the whole thing wet. And in the bathroom, I'll just pull that out. I'll pull that out and put that coldness right on my chest and my neck, just to bring my body to temperature down. And it's really soothing. Normally have to retouch the makeup a bit after that, but that's all good. All good. So see how we just practically answering the body with the body. So in that moment, of course, when you're about to go on, you might not be able to go to the bathroom. It might be too late for that. And this is where you can still do some movement of the shoulders. So I'd say rolling the shoulders backwards or twisting, you can still do a few physical things. And then we bring our second weapon in. And our second weapon is our mind. Our thoughts really do create our reality. This is where you want your pep talk ready to go. You need to say to yourself, 'I've got this. I can do this. I can't wait to get out there. Oh my God, this is so exciting. What an incredible opportunity my body is getting myself ready for peak performance. My body is anticipating a big launch. Those nerves that are here. I'm happy they're here, baby, because I am ready to perform like a pro.'

So see how we can reframe that rather than, 'Oh God, the nerves strike because we're really bad.' No, the excitement is there because we are getting ready to step into our element. We are getting ready to do what we are born to do: to use our voice, to share what we know and love, to give value to the audience. And whoa, isn't it exciting to get out there? So have that ready, working that together. Now I know I'm going through this step by step, but you can do it all quite quickly in the moment. So we've got answering the body with the body. We've got the mind working with us, working for us. The third thing is we want to breathe. We want to breathe. Usually when those nerves strike in that moment, it's because we stopped breathing. That's when the final flight takes over, We've stopped breathing in and out in a beautiful regulated way. So making sure you are breathing in and breathing out sounds quite obvious, but we, we tend to forget to do this. And we're like, 'Oh gosh, I breathe in and I breathe out!' And we just don't know, what's going where. So consciously breathe in through your nose. Imagine that beautiful inspiration, that liquid gold flowing in through your nose, down your windpipe, past your heart space, into your belly. Oh, like it's dropping into a beautiful pond of gold.

And then.... Making sure it flows on out. And I would put your lips together. Like you are sucking through a straw or kind of like a little cat bum kind of shape, and that will help you exhale quite slowly. Just, I know that's probably sounds a bit freaky in the microphone, but you're exhaling quite slowly and that is going to help bring your heart rate down. And again, right into the belly and then long and slow out. Remember, we want to think on the in breath and speak on the out breath.

Think on the in breath, speak on the out breath. And that breathing, especially with that long exhale, we're going to activate the vagus nerve, the 'Las Vegas nerve', that parties all over the body. And this vagus nerve is responsible for bringing us from fight or flight back into what we call rest and digest. Back into a state of control. So there you have it. There's a few other things that you can do and it really depends on the individual. So if I get a little bit of that strike of nerves beforehand, oh look, I've reframed it to be excitement. And so I like it. I actually welcome that feeling. I embrace it. I'm like, 'Woohoo! The nerves are here. Let's get it on, baby.' Right? Well that sounded like I was doing something more sourcery than public speaking, but you know, like I welcome that feeling.

Some people have mentioned to me that they really enjoy getting into conversation with somebody. So starting to speak to somebody backstage or whatever it is. If you've got somebody nearby that can help in that moment. Others like the opposite, which is going somewhere really quiet. But again, you've gotta just be careful because often when these nerves strike, they're right at the last minute and you haven't got a great deal of time. So that's why answer the body with the body. Get your pep talk happening, that inner talk. And take a nice deep breath in deep breath, out deep breath in again, to fuel up And then begin.

Let me know how you go with that. Let me know what you think of that. Put this episode, or let me know on Instagram, tag me @sallyprosservoice. But if you are a business owner or a professional that is doing a lot of public speaking presenting online or on stage or on podcasts or anywhere with your voice, and you're going to be doing more and more of it, I would highly recommend coming and joining us in the Members Only Masterclass Vault, because you will learn so much incredible information that will make you feel really empowered. You're gonna have so many tools in your tool belt that you're gonna be getting out there going, 'Oh, I want stuff to go wrong because I know exactly what to do.' Maybe not, but you'll really be able to learn lots of strategies. Yeah. It's out voice and yes, it's about confidence. We talk about both those things, but a lot of it is about the skills. And you'll be able to steal the tricks of the trade for your next presentation or interview or tricky conversation or anything like that, which is just an invaluable skill set to nurture. If this is what you wanna be doing more of. Alright. That's it from me this week. Thank you so much for joining. Let's finish off how we started today with a nice breath in and breath out. So in through the nose ...And a long sigh out through the mouth. Lots of love to you all. I will see you next time.